Hello hello!
I’m writing to you on New Years Eve from my apartment in Helsinki. It’s almost four pm and the light hasn’t fully disappeared yet, which genuinely feels like a miracle.
I spent the morning sleeping late, then proceeded to scrub the foyer of my apartment with salt water (yes, really). Let me explain.
A few months ago I was randomly seized by an interest in feng shui, which possessed me to research different methods of energetically cleansing a home. I didn’t rearrange any of the furniture, but I did make a small shrine in the southeast corner of the apartment (i.e. an iitala dish filled with amethyst, aventurine and citrine—nothing fancy, but meant to attract abundance). I am a big fan of simplicity and small gestures, and I genuinely believe that little acts done with intention can be just as meaningful as big ones. A new year is beginning, and I want to be ready! I have a feeling that a lot is going to change in 2024, and I’m excited to follow the threads that have started to unwind these last few months (foreshadowing—this newsletter is definitely one of them). Preparing my home for a chapter of new energy felt very nice.
One of my intentions for the upcoming year is to read 40 books, which is partly why I’m forgoing social media. College killed my reading appetite, but in the last few years, with a lot of patience, I’ve gotten it back. I still haven’t returned to my pre-teen-book-fiend-chewing-through-novels-like-they’re-nothing state, but alas! I have hope. I’m starting to believe that your mid-twenties are sort of like a Renaissance Era for childhood interests, except without the embarrassment. Maybe 2024 will be the year I get into entomology again…or pick up the flute…
The last two years I’ve successfully hit my goal of 30 books without any friction. I briefly considered being a maniac and setting my 2024 goal for 50 books, but I decided to be realistic instead. I want to push myself, but I also don’t want to compromise my comprehension. I’m a very slow reader in the sense that I’m a writer—I get hung up on word choice, read gorgeous sentences over and over. I love to marinate in the world of the book I’m reading, and that takes time. So, 40 it is. I’ll be logging my books on goodreads — add me as a friend if you’re on there too!
Some of my more specific reading goals:
get over my poetry ick (don’t ask)
read a book that’s 800+ pages
read more travel writing
dabble in nonfiction
read a book in French
In the last two years I’ve given myself a task: read at least one book from as many notable/important writers as possible. I see this as essential to my development as a writer and a person—it’s expanded my worldview and writing style quite a bit. It also feels good to read classics at my own pace, at my own volition, which is quite unlike the experience of being required to read certain books* in high school.
*(East of Eden—we will forever have beef. I hate you.)
But now, enough stalling. Before the new year begins, here’s an honest recap of my 2023 reads, with a full list at the bottom.
The 3 Best (and Worst) Books of 2023
Best
#1 : Solar Bones, Mike McCormack
I’m not kidding, this book lives in my head rent free. I checked it out from my neighborhood library and strongly considered just…never returning it, simply because of how insane of a reading experience this book was. The ending still haunts me, but that’s not the only thing. Somehow, miraculously, the entire novel is written in flowing prose, meaning: this whole book is written without a single period.
How is this possible? How did it turn out so good? I don’t know. Mike, if you’re reading this, please share your secrets. You’re a genius.
I was so inspired by Solar Bones that I attempted to write the same way, resulting in this piece that I published a few months ago (The Glare). I found that it was bafflingly hard to emulate McCormack’s style, and even harder to write without everything feeling like a jumbled, run-on mess. My brain was fried egg after just 500 words—I truly don’t know how a whole novel happened. If you also attempt this no-periods-prose challenge, please let me know how it goes.
#2 The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt
I’m a huge fan of Tartt’s The Secret History, but an intense hater of The Little Friend. Therefore, I was interested to see what I would make of her most recent goliath, The Goldfinch.
While there are definitely elements of this book I didn’t love, I was immediately immersed in her storytelling. I was marinating in the world she created, and for that I applaud her. Her writing in The Goldfinch felt like a treat, like a magnifying glass; equal parts voyeuristic, beautiful and raw. I was greatly inspired by this book too.
#3 Our Wives Under the Sea, Julia Armfield
Funnily enough, I read this novel right after the whole OceanGate thing went down, so I was perfectly primed for embarking on a literary voyage to the sea floor.
The way this story is written is both gorgeous and haunting and clever. Seriously, so many of the sentences in this book had me gasping out loud because of how good they were. I was particularly impressed by the way the author was able to fluidly balance real and unreal, past and present. It was a winding, descending journey into the depths of the ocean but the depths of a relationship too. Also, it’s incredibly gay, which is always a bonus.
Worst
#1 The Overstory, Richard Powers
Maybe worst isn’t the word I want—I think it’s disappointing. For context, I read this one almost right after The Goldfinch, when I was on a Pulitzer Prize-winning kick. This experience reinforced the fact that, just because something wins a prestigious prize, doesn’t mean it’s good. But I guess it’s also subjective? Idk. Much to think about.
At the beginning of The Overstory I was amazed—really! The writing was very good and chock full of information about trees that I, fellow tree enthusiast, found super interesting. However, it quickly became clear to me that the author didn’t want to write about his six main characters—he just wanted to write about trees. And hey, I can respect that. I really can. But this book didn’t work.
Because the characters felt like an afterthought, it was very difficult to root for them. And, as a result, it was pretty grueling to finish The Overstory (but I did, because I have a weird thing against unfinished books, even if I hate them).
#2 Bunny, Mona Awad
I will preface this one by saying that I think my main issue with this book was that it just wasn’t my style. I gave it a chance since we had it at home and I’d heard good things, but I ended up hating it. Which is a shame, because the main character is a creative writing grad student, and normally I’m ALL about that.
The main character never really bloomed, and the four other main characters were indistinguishable from each other. Aesthetically the writing was interesting, and I can see what the author was going for, but the book to me was like cotton candy—all fluff, no substance. Did not live up to the hype.
#3 The Atlas Six, Olivie Blake
Maybe you’re seeing a pattern here. I was so impressed by this book at the beginning. It had been forever since I’ve read something in the fantasy/YA genre, and I wanted to indulge Little Sid. There will always be a place in my heart for magic worlds and dystopian fiction, even if it’s not really what I reach for anymore. However, the further into the book I got the more disappointed I was. There was simultaneously too much explanation and not enough, with a narrative style that seemed a bit like the author didn’t trust the reader to follow along. Somehow this still resulted in character development that came out of nowhere and a plot that was difficult to discern. I wanted to love this book, but ultimately I did not.
Full 2023 List:
Orlando, Virginia Wolf
Second Place, Rachel Cusk*
The Dangers of Smoking in Bed, Mariana Enriquez
Beautiful World, Where Are You, Sally Rooney*
Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
Conventry: Essays, Rachel Cusk
The Left Hand of Darkness, Usula K. Le Guin*
Closer Baby Closer, Savannah Brown
The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt*
Play It As It Lays, Joan Didion
The Overstory, Richard Powers
Pure Colour, Sheila Heiti*
The Bell, Iris Murdoch*
Bunny, Mona Awad
Anything That Moves, Jamie Stewart
Our Wives Under the Sea, Julia Armfield*
The Lighthouse, Alison Moore
Temples of Delight, Barbara Trapido*
Can’t and Won’t, Lydia Davis
The Employees: A Workplace Novel of the 22nd Century, Olga Ravn*
Solar Bones, Mike McCormack*
A Haunted House, Virgina Woolf
Mouthful of Birds, Samantha Schweblin
The Mountain is You, Brianna Wiest
The Atlas Six, Olivie Blake
The Doors of Perception, Aldous Huxley*
Dalvi: Six Years in the Arctic Tundra, Laura Galloway*
Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson*
Go Tell it On the Mountain, James Baldwin*
Before the Coffee Gets Cold, Toshikazu Kawaguchi
(Books with an * are ones that I recommend reading/really liked!)
My first book of 2024 is The Sea, The Sea, by Iris Murdoch. I’ve already started and it is ~delicious~. Murdoch is definitely becoming one of my new favorite authors.
Please leave a comment with your reading goals/current books, I’d love to know!
As always, thank you for being here. I’m so excited for another year full of writing and connection and exploring. I can’t wait to see how this little writing corner evolves :)
xx Sidney
"I am a big fan of simplicity and small gestures, and I genuinely believe that little acts done with intention can be just as meaningful as big ones."
"I’m starting to believe that your mid-twenties are sort of like a Renaissance Era for childhood interests, except without the embarrassment."
"I’m a very slow reader in the sense that I’m a writer—I get hung up on word choice, read gorgeous sentences over and over. I love to marinate in the world of the book I’m reading, and that takes time."
yes ma'am.